It took nearly half a century for Birch Parlee to be herself.
Christened at birth in 1965 as Bernard Thomas, the first-born son of an evangelical minister, she spoke candidly with the Spotlight about her path.
香蕉视频直播淚n about Grade 3 or 4, about the time I really became aware that boys and girls were different, I wanted to be a girl. I started to imitate girls and it didn香蕉视频直播檛 take me long to find out that wasn香蕉视频直播檛 cool香蕉视频直播 lot of bullying and teasing followed me throughout my school years,香蕉视频直播� she said.
香蕉视频直播淭here was a sense of misalignment that I didn香蕉视频直播檛 have any language to understand. I saw it as something fundamentally wrong with me.香蕉视频直播�
Pressured to conform to family expectations and social norms, she was a church worship leader for 15 years.
香蕉视频直播淚 buried it. I pushed it down. I lived a lie.香蕉视频直播�
She grew a full beard and went so far as to pursue 香蕉视频直播渕anly香蕉视频直播� occupations, was a commercial fisher for 15 years, and later a farmworker and truck driver.
Two marriages ended in divorce 香蕉视频直播渁nd a lot of heartache香蕉视频直播hey both needed a man and I cannot be one. I think that would be the way to boil it down.香蕉视频直播�
Birch is one of approximately 132,000 transgender people living across our nation, according to Statistics Canada.
While encouraging curiosity, she waves off the need for politically correct language.
香蕉视频直播淚 don香蕉视频直播檛 get my panties in a bunch about that.香蕉视频直播�
Birch began coming out publicly about three years ago, shortly after moving to the community with her partner Saskia.
香蕉视频直播淎 quite elderly woman in this town, who was attending a function at the library, walked up to me afterwards and said 香蕉视频直播榟ello.香蕉视频直播� She asked me if I considered myself a woman or a man in a dress. For me, that wasn香蕉视频直播檛 offensive. It was an opportunity for me to tell a bit of my story.香蕉视频直播�
It was Saskia who created a space where Birch could be honest.
香蕉视频直播淪askia was someone who loved me in a way that I felt safe and I could be honest with her. Once I was honest with her, out of those conversations, I finally was able to admit it to myself. I no longer felt there was something wrong with me. I am just different.香蕉视频直播�
The relationship was already mostly devoid of gender roles and stereotypes. 香蕉视频直播淭he only thing that was different was that I was able to let go of pretending in any way of being a man, or trying.香蕉视频直播�
Recently Birch changed her name and her legal gender and the two were married in August 2020.
香蕉视频直播淚 am legally a woman and we are legally a lesbian couple, but she doesn香蕉视频直播檛 really like labels.香蕉视频直播�
Birch receives a hormone therapy of estrogen and progesterone and noted many transgender people regard questions about surgery 香蕉视频直播渁s nobody else香蕉视频直播檚 business.香蕉视频直播�
She said: 香蕉视频直播淚n the initial phase, I couldn香蕉视频直播檛 even comprehend it and I was perhaps in judgment of people who did it. In the beginning, I believed that it is what香蕉视频直播檚 inside that matters. The problem is outside is perpetually undermining your sense of inside and I think trans people do become a little bit obsessed with their appearance. It is an attempt to bring your inside and your outside into alignment.香蕉视频直播�
Birch described the acceptance of the Princeton community 香蕉视频直播渁s almost unbelievably positive in many, many ways.香蕉视频直播� Still, she added, 香蕉视频直播渢here are certain places I don香蕉视频直播檛 go, where I don香蕉视频直播檛 feel quite safe.香蕉视频直播�
And she remarked with consternation on a recent Spotlight story about an altercation at a local bar allegedly incited by slurs against a transgender patron.
For the most part, Birch香蕉视频直播檚 family, including two children, step-children and siblings, are supportive.
香蕉视频直播淢y father tries,香蕉视频直播� she said, 香蕉视频直播渂ut it香蕉视频直播檚 hard.香蕉视频直播�
When asked what advice she would give her younger self, she does not hesitate.
香蕉视频直播淒on香蕉视频直播檛 be afraid. Don香蕉视频直播檛 hide. Find a way to be yourself. It香蕉视频直播檚 a journey香蕉视频直播eople assume that I made a choice to be trans and people really need to understand it isn香蕉视频直播檛 something you choose. It香蕉视频直播檚 something you are and the choice is whether or not you accept it.香蕉视频直播�
Do you have something to add to this story, or something else we should report on? Email:andrea.demeer@similkameenspotlight.com
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