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Salmon Arm men's march part of healing journey

'Ï㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦there's no way in hell IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™d be here, where I am, without this group'
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Craig Johansen and Faizan Sabzaali help run the Shuswap Men's Circle support group for the Shuswap Hospice Society.

Craig Johansen is doubtful he'd be where he is now without the Shuswap Men's Circle, a group he co-leads for the Shuswap Hospice Society. 

The Salmon Arm resident explained the group has, in the past year helped him through difficult periods of his own. 

"I know that if I wouldnÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™t have had the support, I probably wouldnÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™t be here. IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve been down that roadÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦ there's no way in hell IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™d be here, where I am, without this group," said Johansen.

This statement may be surprising given how passionate Johansen is when speaking about the Men's Circle, and how he's seen it help other men by providing a safe space where they can speak about how and what they're feeling, be heard and not be ashamed to let themselves cry. 

"WeÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve had some pretty extreme men coming through there that are on a journey of healing beyond anything IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve ever seen, and all of a sudden theyÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™re the ones that are coming back two months, three months later, and theyÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™re saying this is the most profound thing I've had and itÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s been sitting on my mind and in my heart since," said Johansen. "They begin bawling, and all of a sudden the other men are there holding themÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦ they fall into our arms, being like, 'I have needed this.'"

Johansen empathizes, acknowledging he too needed the group.

"When this came up it was so profound because I needed it," said Johansen. "When I was younger, I didnÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™t have any thing like this."

Johansen was given an opportunity to help start the group following the 2022 Launch-A-Preneur competition in which he sought support for The Confidants, a community of individuals who people can turn to for help and healing. While not a certified mental health provider, Johansen said he was contacted by the Shuswap Hospice Society, which wanted to establish a support group for men. Since then, he's seen more than 100 men from all different walks of life take part in the weekly group. 

The Shuswap Men's Circle is not a substitute for professional care. Instead, it offers a place for individuals to connect, "support and encourage each other to become more heart-centreed and aware in our lives."

"Most of these guys have never even thought it OK to talk about their feelings, they never thought it was actually allowed for them to have feelings let alone talk about themÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦," said Johansen. "They never had a place they felt safe enough to even express any kind of emotion, to actually feel safe enough to have a cry in front of other men."

Though it is not a religious group, they do not shy away from spirituality. Each meeting begins with a smudging ceremony, of the room and everyone in attendance. 

"Before anybody goes into the room, I smudge and clear the room energy wise, I smudge every man that comes through the doorÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦," said Johansen, adding someone else will do this if he can't attend. "Basically, the idea is whatever weÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™re bringing throughout that day, and the energy that has clung to us is gone, it's washed away. We do sweat lodges. We have the Indigenous side of things as well, we honour the landÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦"

With it being National Suicide Prevention Week (Sept 8-14), the group has planned a "mini-march" through downtown Salmon Arm that will begin at 6 p.m. on Thursday, Sept. 12. The subject hits Johansen hard, in part from his past work with a funeral home 

"I was the guy that went and picked up the bodies after whatever happenedÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦," explained Johansen. "All of a sudden IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™m like, OK, the amount of suicides, menÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s suicides that I had to pick up Ï㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥“ I had the honour to hold and cherish their body as they were transitioning to the next phase of their life. It was profound and IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™m like, this is not OK, the amount of men that IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve seen personally, that I canÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™t un-seeÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦What was going on in their life?  Where was the help? Where was the support? Did they know there are groups? Did they know there are people out there?"

For those uncomfortable with a group setting, men or women, Johansen will make himself available. Though it's not unusual for people have a friend/acquaintance accompany them to their first group meeting, Johansen stressed it's important individuals choose to attend. He noted the group isn't just for the benefit of those attending, but also their loved ones and the community at large. 

"If I can change myself, if I can learn how to be a better manÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥¦ a better grandfather or a better father, in turn that actually starts healing them and IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve watched the ripple effect, IÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™ve watched the people in my life start being better," said Johansen. "LetÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s be that leader, letÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s be that example.  Even in this little town, imagine the movement we could make in this little town if people actually understood that itÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s OK as a man to talk, itÏ㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥™s OK to actually have support Ï㽶ÊÓƵֱ²¥“ men, women and kids need that."

The Shuswap Men's Circle meets at 7 p.m. on Thursdays at the Shuswap Hospice Society office at 781 Marine Park Drive. It is free and people are welcome to drop in. The march will begin from the office at 6 p.m. For more information about the group and others offered by hospice, visit shuswaphospice.ca and/or call 250-832-7099.

Those in urgent need of mental health care can visit their local hospital emergency room or call the B.C. crisis line at 1800-784-2433, or dial 9-8-8 if you are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including thoughts of suicide. 

Mental health support is also available through Interior Health's mental health and substance use centres at 310-6478. Salmon Arm Mental Health Services can be reached at 250-832-4117. Other resources for men and women include the Canadian Mental Health Association Shuswap-Revelstoke at 250-832-8477 or shuswap-revelstoke.cmha.bc.ca, the SAFE Society at 250-832-9616 or safesociety.ca, the B.C. Mental Health Support Line at 310-679.

 



Lachlan Labere

About the Author: Lachlan Labere

Editor, Salmon Arm Observer
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